#i'm just so upset and angry and frustrated

[avatarofthearchives]

One of my headcanons for Michael Shelley is that he always had low-simmering rage.

It started when he was a kid, right after Ryan disappeared and the adults around him became frustrated by his confusing story. He was asked so many times what really happened that day, and he never had an answer to give. Not even to himself.

It wasn't long before their frustration crawled under his skin and became something he internalized. He spent a long time being mad at himself for being too disoriented by what happened that day to be of any help to Ryan in the aftermath. Yet, he was upset with someone else too: The adults who wouldn't believe that something strange had happened to him. Who wouldn't just say "Yes. That sounds scary. I'm sorry you had to go through that," instead of "That couldn't have happened."

When he joined The Magnus Institute, that angry part of him was giddy to have the chance to prove them wrong. He wanted to find books and statements about missing people that would give him the chance to say "See! I was right all along!" But he didn't. And every time it seemed like he stumbled on something close Emma would run up behind him and put all his eagerness to rest with a reasonable explanations.

That only made Michael's frustration grow. He was in the one place he could hope to find answers, and he was still just as lost as when he started. He could feel himself become a little angrier everyday, but he shoved it all down to be just as pleasant and kind as he always was. After all, he didn't want to scare his frail, timid, elderly boss by having a meltdown and ripping down every shelf in the place until he found the information that would validate him. So he just bottled it all up.

Up until he became The Distortion and exploded.

[writingwisterias]

WAITER! WAITER! Need me different era leons reacting to reader starting sobbing during rather chill argument. Idk if this make sense😭😭😭 i mean like if theres no fights or loud talking during the argument, leon is just complaining and being real abt it but it hurts reader bc they are sensitive and they start crying

HIII!

I actually love this, I'm the type of person to cry out of anger and super sensitive LMAO! I hope you enjoy <3

Warnings: Arguments, comfort, GN! Reader

RE2:

You weren't really sure where the argument had come from at first, the day had seemingly turned out okay at first until you both got home

Maybe he was just overwhelmed from adjusting back to normality after the 2 years training

But it didn't mean he needed to pick at your outfit or just get annoyed at you in general

You tried not to let it get to you but after his 3rd comment you broke

His complaints weren't meant to be taken to heart but he forgot about how sensitive you were. How you haven't been through what he has

He's quick to change his tone, one that's more soothing and comfortable as he eases you.

Whispering sweet nothings in your ear, pressing you as close to him as he can in a hug to ensure you calm down with scent of him

He will apologize don't worry

RE4R:

It was barely an argument more of a disagreement over chosing the film to watch

He wasn't listening to why you wanted to watch your comfort film. Why today was hard so watching the horror he has lined up was not good

It was a short comment, one that you wouldn't have been bothered about normally but today you felt extra fragile

When he hears your sniffles he freezes in place it goes straight to his heart

He's smothering you with his love and affection because he feels bad, the comfort film is on and you won't be leaving his arms until he is sure you are okay

Infinite Darkness:

He's stressed at work, it's not his fault he's slightly short with you

And it's not your fault you didn't read his tone very well

He wasn't angry at you rather complaining about an ache he couldn't shake since his last mission

When offering ways to help he snapped saying that he could deal with it on his own

you didn't take offense to it understanding his need to be independent but it struck a nerve causing you to tear up

It only made it worse when he started to apologize and cuddle like you deserved it

You did. It wasn't your fault but somehow you wired your brain to think you made it worse for him

When you start sobbing he's moving faster to make sure you calm down, he knows your over reaction also isn't your fault and he should know to word his sentences differently

Damnation:

He didn't really notice that there was an off tone in his voice so he also didn't notice you were upset until he heard your sniffles

I think he would be confused at first a bit reluctant to give you the affection you needed to calm down but he's genuinely confused

He wasn't angry just annoyed at something and you are acting like he's stabbed your family member

Eventually he does comfort you and it's a long intimite comfort session.

I'm talking cuddling and running his fingers through your hair. He would apologise as well, its only a small gruff one but he knows your reaction isn't your fault.

He find it's cute how much you care, despite it being overwhelming sometimes.

RE6:

Again he relieves Raccoon City again almost within the events of the game

He keeps most of his composure until he gets home

You get the brunt of his anger and frustrations. Having to tip toe around him as he relives trauma.

It's not until you see he only acts this way with you that you snap. You can't help it you are angry with how he's treating you

I feel like hell attempt to come up with some bs that he's just that comfortable with you he shows a different side but he's not even falling himself

Promises to work on it and you have some understanding of his situation

You will get kisses and cuddles after

Vendetta:

He's a mess, you know it, I know it

So he's going to be snappy,short or even just not himself

He's really struggling at this point so when you do snap I think he's going to respond negatively at first

As he sees you grow more sensitive he will start to feel bad and it's actually his apology that makes you cry

The idea that even in his struggles he still cares about what you think is enough to make you cry

He's sorry for being a dick but also just confused at how him simply admitting that is enough for you to cry

Death Island:

Not in a harsh way but he would start to laugh, only because he finds it so cute

He's reassuring you that he's not actually angry his tone just doesn't always match his words or the joke doesn't come out the way he wanted it

His laugh makes you laugh and helps calm you down

I imagine he's very good at distracting you from everything that made you upset. A stable wall for you to use in order to calm down.

[pascalislove]

THE CALL: Han Jeong-Won x Fem!Reader~5

Summary: Your arrival would change everything, even if Jeong-Won didn't know it yet.

Dinner at Jeong-Won's mansion passed in tense silence. Y/N moved her fork around the plate, breaking off pieces of the meat half-heartedly. Loki slept near the table, oblivious to the charged atmosphere that floated between them.

—Do you always eat in this funereal atmosphere? Y/N asked, breaking the silence with her characteristic sarcastic tone.

Jeong-Won didn't even look up. —I prefer silence. Y/N put the fork down on the plate with a thud.

—Look, we're going to live together for a year, at least we could try not to behave like two strangers in a waiting room.Jeong-Won finally looked up, his dark eyes shining with a mix of irritation and exhaustion.

—I'm not interested in playing happy family with you. —Did you know? —she said, crossing her arms—. You are the most insufferable and self-centered guy I have ever met. —And you think I enjoy this? Jeong-Won dropped the cutlery with a clatter.

—Of course not,— Y/N replied wryly.— You only hired me to spite your ex-wife—The tension broke when Jeong-Won shot to his feet, his voice rising into an angry shout.

—If you don't like it, you can leave! —Y/N looked at him, surprised by the intensity of his words, but refused to back down. —You know what, Mr. Han?, It's not even worth arguing with you.—Without waiting for a response, he left the room with firm steps, leaving behind the echo of his own words and the latent frustration.

That night, Y/N tried to sleep, but the memory of the argument continued to haunt her mind. I was upset, yes, but also curious. What the hell had broken this man to the point of making him so bitter?Hours passed, and just as she began to fall into a light sleep, a piercing scream made her sit bolt upright in bed.

—No! No! The sound came from Jeong-Won's room. Y/N stood up quickly, her heart racing. —Jeong-Won? —he called from the hallway, but got no response. She pushed open the door, finding him writhing on the bed, drenched in sweat, his face twisted in pain.

—Don't leave me! Don't go! —he screamed in the middle of his nightmare, his voice broken by terror. Without a second thought, Y/N walked over and gently shook his shoulder.

—Jeong-Won, wake up. It's just a nightmare.He snapped his eyes open, breathing hard, lost between dream and reality. “You're okay,” Y/N whispered, keeping her voice soft. It was just a bad dream. It took Jeong-Won a few seconds to catch his breath. He sat up in bed, running a trembling hand through his damp hair.

“Go away,” he murmured, although his voice lacked its usual harshness. “No,” Y/N replied firmly. I'm not going to leave you alone after that. He looked at her in disbelief, but said nothing. “I know you don't want me here, but maybe you need someone,” Y/N added, softening her tone. No one should deal with this alone, Jeong-Won. He looked away, but didn't look at her again. Y/N watched him silently, understanding that behind all his coldness and arrogance was a broken man, trapped by ghosts from the past. Y/N stood up, giving him one last look before leaving the room.

—Good night.

Although Jeong-Won didn't say it out loud, that night was the first time in a long time that someone stayed close, even when he tried to push her away.

This story does not follow the plot of the series, tell me if you like it and if you want me to tag you in the chapters🫶

Tag list:

@anamiad00msday, @czarinera

THE CALL MASTERLIST

[cupidhoons]

this post is not to able hate to writers or authors at all, and i don't condone any hate towards them. this is simply me doing the same thing that they hoped to do, which was to call me out.

but since some of this is flying over some people's heads to save face—you know who you are—let me explain myself again before i put myself on a long break (willingly, for myself & not because i want to avoid the situation): i am not angered by the fact that i got called out. i understand where my actions lay in people's hearts and how my actions come across as ignorant and insensitive to many, i understand that. i understand where many of my followers & many of my fellow writers are coming from, and i understand why they are angry, because my actions were insensitive and they only want to look out for me. i can come about that, but if it were really them using their best judgment, wouldn't at least 3 people come about my dms and ask me what's going on? i can accept my mistakes, educate myself for the better, and grow as a person. i can talk about my mistakes openly, but in this situation i had absolutely no time to. this situation is far different from what i expected from writers on blr who are older than me & claim to be mature.

i am not angered by the fact that i got called out, no. that's not it, and to be putting that in my mouth like it came from me isn't okay. i'm not "victimizing" myself nor am i wanting a pity party or "stirring up drama." this is about a writer attacking my character and grouping me with awful people, and if you guys cannot wrap your heads around that, then by all means drop by my inbox and save her face. this is not me victimizing myself or stirring up online drama. i'm better than that. but when it comes to someone assuming that they know me, assuming that they know my friends, assuming that they know me personally, and to make a blank accusation of me is where i draw the line. this is simply a case of me defending myself while also calling out a fellow writer for her mistakes. isn't that the intent she had also? to call out a fellow writer for her actions and insensitivity? there's a difference between someone genuinely caring about my well being and just plain out looking down on me and my character.

you all can believe what you believe, and i'm not doing this for pity again. i'm not doing this so i could gain followers and attention. i'm doing this because i don't appreciate people assuming and telling me what i am and am not when they don't know the story. could this have been handled differently if they had approached me in a way that wasn't so disrespectful? yes, i believe it could've, and it would've saved me from a lot of stress and frustration. but unfortunately this is the way it is. if me defending myself from accusations is such a problem, then go ahead and complain. just note that if this were another writer speaking, you guys would come to defend them.

i understand both sides of frustration, i truly do. so if i can take the time to understand why a good amount of people are upset with my actions, then why can't the opposing party see my points & see the bigger picture here?

it's weird how you aren't speaking out for the fact that you are using a zionist for your fics. shouldn't you be apologizing or at least acknowledging it? the lack of maturity you have 😭 girl just deleted it and didn't even apologize for it.

perfect timing actually anon! i have a whole post drafted on it in my google docs but i can assure you it's not me apologizing for defending myself against writers accusing me of such things. while i do acknowledge my mistake of not being educated enough on lana del rey and her practically begging the president to fund the genocide, i hope you guys do realize that equating me to being a zionist from this situation is just as insensitive and ignorant.

i urge you guys to read my side on this & understand why me and my two other mutuals are upset.

hi guys! as you all know (or assuming that many of you know) that recently i am being accused of supporting zionism/being called a zionist in general by multiple writers on tumblr. before i go on to defending and dropping screenshots of what actually happened & going on to explain my side of the story, let's take a look at the definition of zionism & why it is absolutely NOT okay to throw it around so lightly.

ZIONISM is not only the general term of supporting israel, but also the term that supports the national ethnic cleansing of palestine, which equates to killing all muslims. (defined by @pshbites or more known as kaia & her other muslim friends who grew up knowing that this is what this word meant.) 

READ ANOTHER DEFINITION FROM JEWISH VOICE FOR PEACE (LINK): “While it had many strains historically, the Zionism that took hold and stands today is a settler-colonial movement, establishing an apartheid state where Jews have more rights than others. Our own history teaches us how dangerous this can be.

Palestinian dispossession and occupation are by design. Zionism has meant profound trauma for generations, systematically separating Palestinians from their homes, land, and each other. Zionism, in practice, has resulted in massacres of Palestinian people, ancient villages and olive groves destroyed, families who live just a mile away from each other separated by checkpoints and walls, and children holding onto the keys of the homes from which their grandparents were forcibly exiled.”

i also urge you to check for more information on kaia’s blog & her personal take on this.

so, now that we know what it means & why it's such a loaded word, let's take a look at what the situation at hand looked/looks like:

the other day i posted a sunghoon fic titled “ultraviolence” inspired by lana del rey’s song (it's now changed to “pictures of us, which was my original title for the fic but thought it didn't quite fit the vibe). now, why is this a problem? because i'm apparently “promoting” an artist that begged the president to fund the genocide in gaza, when NOWHERE in my work stated that you should stream lana’s song, become a fan of her’s, and also support/fund a genocide. 

while i do admit that i handled the “anons” (and i put in quotes bc i know for a fact they were ppl who i knew sent them in) terribly and also explained my own personal thoughts and feelings on this topic badly, my words should not be twisted and blown out of proportion to the point where people can freely accuse me of being part of such a horrible and disgusting group of people.

however, that's only the general situation. the real problem for me was when yesterday morning at exactly 7:22am (this timestamp is important for what i'm about to say later on), okwonyos or better known as jiah, texted me, letting me know that she saw the way i responded to the anon & accused me of “actively supporting” someone who “begged the president to fund the killing of millions of children, women, and men of palestine.” (see screenshots below)

now, you guys may think that she's only doing what's right & willingly called out a mutual for not having her morals straight, but to be blankly accusing someone of being a zionist when i've been it clear that i stand with palestine & basically saying i'm stupid does not sit right with me. 

her saying that she “isn't going to try and make me gain common sense” was so off topic & so unnecessary to bring up & could've left it at me having my own take on separating the art from the artist, which to many people on blr, “does not exist.” but if separating the art from the artist does not exist, then shouldn't we boycott enhypen too? shouldn't we also stop writing and supporting enhypen too? because last time i checked enhypen, and along with many other groups/artists, are underneath zionist companies. so with that logic, should we just stop consuming content from enhypen and our favorite groups/artists all in all? because if we are going by this logic, then we’re ALL zionists and we are all PROMOTING zionism. 

another thing is when she says “it's weird that you barely talked about what was happening in palestine until it was to defend a zionist.” ??? defending a zionist WHERE exactly? i told the “anons” i received a day before this conversation that i am not a hardcore lana del rey fan, and again, nowhere did i say that i was defending lana & her actions of again, wanting the preseident to fund a genocide. keep in mind also, that she DOES NOT know me personally & that i was NEVER close to her nor did i EVER consider her a FRIEND, so she (along with other writers) has no right to accuse me of “not speaking up about palestine” enough. 

so the fact that im being known as a supporter killing innocent lives of people in the enhablr community when the fact is that i've spoken up about it numerous times in my personal life & have encouraged many people in my life to donate and spread the daily click all because i don't “reblog enough” about it sits weird to me. not only that, but it also gives me the vibe that many writers on tumblr—weather it's true or not—thinks of this genocide as a trend and does it as “preformative activism” for the sake of not wanting to lose followers. (kaia’s post touches more on this too)

now obviously, i did reply to her message and did go back and forth with her for some time while i was present in school. me, being offended & GREATLY angered by her choice of words & going as far as associating me with such people, rightfully called her out on it & brought up the fact that her saying that isn't “cute” or right at all. but clearly, this was all read wrong & i wasnt able to explain or expand on it properly because i was simultaneously also in my homeroom speaking with my friends! 

and i know, someone is going to bring up the fact that i shouldn't have responded immediately or that i could've responded later in my day, but keep in mind that if i didnt, i probably would've been blocked anyway without getting the chance to explain myself properly. i cant help but feel that they messaged me purposefully during that time because they know i would be defenseless either way. 

im going to tell it straight now and say that i know i am in the wrong for not being able to explain myself properly & not touching on these points more in the moment, but i had absolutely NO time throughout the day to explain myself as i was blocked almost immediately by everyone, which says a lot, especially when one of the mutuals who blocked me right after that conversation was close to me & who i even considered my friend. 

besides that however, i will say this once more & once again that i am NOT what numerous people on tumblr think i am & none of you guys know me at all personally either. you guys can believe what you want about this situation, but i urge you all to get to know both sides at the very least before following what bigger writers say. im not doing this to maintain my following or even gain more followers, i just don't appreciate people calling & associating me with a group of people that i am so against. i don't at all appreciate people assuming they know me and my character all so well when absolutely none of them have ever bothered to reach out to me and even get to know me. 

but yes anon, go ahead and tell me how immature i am & say it with your full chest how i am a zionist for simply using a popular song that everyone has heard one way or another as my title on my fic!

[r0bbers02]

I can't understand people who love this show or books but hate any of the "main characters" (mostly anyone from the shows main 4 characters, Louis, lestat, Armand and Daniel)

like yeah all of the have flaws, but they also have qualities for redemption

honestly I think watching the show or reading the books with that hatred for any of the characters or the ships must be miserable and sad

seeing the constant discourse (mainly on Twitter) of whose better or worse according to arguments without any kind of nuance make me mad

like why don't you focus on what you like instead of what you don't

I also hate the mischaracterization of some of the characters in this fandom, especially the one on complex characters like Armand or Lestat

And especially why do you talk shit about the actors who have done nothing but give their whole souls and energy to this project, who really don't deserve your negativity and hate

[cementcornfield]

???

[ficoandleo]

[Please convince your violent husband to use the sensory deprivation tanks at Darkwick General instead of committing crimes against his own body. I've already wrangled permissions for him to use them freely, he just needs to show up.]

@ask-doctor-isami

He starts to type 'He's not my husband' but concludes that it's besides the point and a waste of time to say. He knows who he means.

He hasn't done anything abnormally dangerous since then, but if I think he's acting strange again I'll see what I can do

Not that that BTH listens to me. But he might consider it more if I suggest it

On the other hand the more I think about it the more I don't know if leaving him alone with nothing but his thoughts is a good idea

He flies off the handle at random. He might just feel worse in there

Maybe he'll tell me why he doesn't like the idea at least

[nakitengoku]

Home not even for 24 hours and my parents are being vaguely racist -_- this is why I'm only planning on visiting maybe once this year

[neverendingford]

.

[girlitfeelsgood]

Why am I like this

[goldentigerfestival]

Using this as an audio reference for the posts I'm making, but to summarize:

Yuri starts out mad.

Yuri tries to calm himself down with a deep breath to ask for details instead of going through it angry.

Flynn doesn't say "like a good knight" in the sense of putting himself down. He simply says "as a knight" (the tl here doesn't use that, but with that included it's basically along the lines of "even though I had doubts, as a knight, I was determined to follow my orders").

Once Yuri has answers he calms down significantly.

Yuri uses " 'ttaku", which is a shortened down version of "mattaku" (Yuri often shortens words and speaks very casually), which in this particular situation basically would mean "geez", or "good grief". In this manner, it's expressive of exasperation/frustration/etc.

Yuri never mentions that "Flynn told him what to do" like the dub does (because in fact Flynn did not ever tell Yuri what to do. He only gave Sodia and his other knights orders. He expressed his own desire to take responsibility, but never told Yuri and his friends what to do).

At this point you can tell the anger has gone out of him and that he's calmed down, now that Flynn is approaching this with admission and responsibility.

Sodia is asking that Flynn returns as soon as possible (I believe this was a general translation error).

Flynn's thank you to Yuri is tonally much more heartfelt.

Yuri's response and gratefulness at Flynn coming back to himself is tonally much more heartfelt, relieved and sincere.

[crystalkleure]

What they do not tell you about harassment is that if the people trying to get a rise out of you are not succeeding by prodding you directly, they will change tactics and try to get a rise out of you by harassing your friends

Even somebody who isn't particularly affected by verbal abuse being directed towards themself is likely to be very upset by their friends getting dragged into it and getting hurt

[pondscummy]

WILD to have been feeling like I was overreacting about my roommate for days and feeling like oh I'm just not giving them enough credit I'm sure they do care about me even though I'm usually pretty comfortable expressing hurt or need to friends and I don't feel safe doing that w them I'm sure it's exclusively a me problem. and then. scrolling back through this vent blog and it's just a log of various times they've hurt my feelings LMFAO

[tin-can-iron-man]

.

[sideshow-cellophane-blog]

Short rant. That moment when you realize how drained the people around you make you feel as the mom friend. It's hit me.

Not even just as an introvert. I feel like I'm never listened to by the people I surround myself with. I keep speaking my mind and I'm ignored, but I keep giving and they'll keep taking. I stop giving, and they'll find a way to take ("I think I'll help myself to *something I didn't ask permission for but I'm taking it anyway*" or "it's your fault for working these shifts so we can't hang out even though I know your schedule" or "oh you need a shoulder? Well I'm in more pain than you are and I'll tell you why instead of let you continue").

I feel like I'm taking care of children more than I am hanging out with friends. Like dang. I'm the mom friend. It doesn't mean you should treat me like your mother. I've been really hurt by these people and it's started to affect my self esteem and mental health. There are these little interactions that have built up over the years and snowballed into bigger issues because they do what they want without thinking of others. I've gotten a few apologies for incidents but it's only when I bring it up. Obviously I can't control anybody. But not willing to meet in the middle is a common theme within our circle.

A few instances have occured most recently that have made me seriously introspect.

[draconifay]

I feel like more people need to understand this:

Just because you're frustrated or upset at someone, doesn't mean it's okay to say and do hurtful things to them.

You're allowed to feel your feelings, but please communicate in a CONSTRUCTIVE way with someone so you can better problem solve rather than taking out your frustrations on someone. ESPECIALLY if what they're doing to frustrate you is not out of malice.

If it IS out of malice, and they don't change, you set boundaries or remove yourself from the situation if you can.

If it's not though - you're just barring any chance of working through issues with someone when you go on the offense by default. And it doesn't help fix anything.